Mothers and daughters
A portrait series taking a deeper look at the complex relationship.
Each set are being asked the same questions.
1. What is a quality or aspect of your personality you think you share?
2. What is an aspect of your personality you think is most different?
3. What is something you learned from your mother or daughter that you could not have learned from anyone else?
Marcia and Jenny
Marcia on her daughter, Jenny
1. I'm sorry to say that the quality of my personality that I have passed on to Jenny is my anxiety and nervousness over conditions that I don't have any control over. We both spend too much of our time fretting about things we can't improve or change. The one good thing is that we have everyone's best interest at heart.
2. The major thing that I have found most different and have learned to appreciate from Jenny is her fearlessness to change. For 71 years I have lived in the same city, same neighborhood, doing the same old routine day after day. Jenny has never been afraid to change professions, change her expectations of herself, or where she lives and works.
I wish I had her wanderlust. I'm trying to spread my wings finally.
3. I have learned inner strength from Jenny. She has made a significant change to her day to day life and her health. She has come a long way to think of her well being above others, and others opinions. To be her own person first.
Jenny on her mom, Marcia
1. One of the most common qualities my Mom and I share is the way we respond and articulate to people, places and things. I love listening to my Mother (even though she thinks I don’t! Ha!) tell stories. She’s such a terrific writer and listener. Our deliveries and sense of humor in a conversation are often very alike and animated and scratchy-voiced. It’s a shared passion of ours, this story-seeking life, and with that comes some anxiety of always wanting/needing/creating the next passage to the story. We’re both working on that though, the “not getting too far ahead of ourselves” and just focusing on this good life instead of the story. I’m really grateful that my Mom totally understands what that’s like, and I’m really proud at our growth in that anxiety department.
2. I have had the fortunate ability to be completely free from all labels, titles and rules for my entire adult life. I am currently 41 years old having never gotten married and having no children of my own. The boundless lifestyle and experiences I was able to attain came from loving nourishment of that from my Mother. I think it was very important for her to know that I recognized my value in my differences from others and my uniqueness. Growing up in the 60’s my Mother’s life could not have been more different than mine. By 1979, my fabulous Mom had 4 kids. She had a really long marriage to my Dad and a career for 25 years. I bet if times were able to flip times, maybe not
exactly like how I did it, but I think my Ma woulda done a bit more exploring. I’m watching her go for it now though. She’s cool and brave.
3. Grace. From a very young age I watched my Mother step up and care for people sick or in need with grace, humility and love. My grandmother suffered a stroke when I was about 8 or 9. At around the same time my youngest sister, Julie, had to have major surgery on her legs. So imagine now here are 2 hospital beds in our family room, 2 hurt and sick people that she loves so much, and us still- Me, my other two siblings, my Dad, cousins who stayed and Uncles who basically lived at our house. With no burden, my Mother healed us up and kept going. No complaints or resentment. She made sure to laugh and host big family parties and work hard. All with grace. Tellin stories, catching curve balls and tossin em back.