Mothers and Daughters
A portrait series taking a deeper look at the complex relationship.
Each set are being asked the same questions.
1. What is a quality or aspect of your personality you think you share?
2. What is an aspect of your personality you think is most different?
3. What is something you learned from your mother or daughter that you could not have learned from anyone else?
Debra and Tara
Debra on her daughter, Tara
1. We're both strong, powerful. We both share that. I think you're like me in that you voice your opinion with no doubt about it. It's not easy for me to hide mine. We don't hide feelings too well *laughs*. Like even with me, you can tell something is wrong. Just like with you, I can tell. We're both kind. We fight for the underdog.
2. You're more adventurous. I can tell you that upfront! But I see that as a positive of what I wish I could have been. I see in you things I wish I could have done when I was younger, but didn't do, and I'm so happy you do it. You're a lot more independent than I was at your age. You don't worry about stuff like I do. At least you don't appear to. You're a lot calmer and I wish that I could not worry so much *laughs*
3. Everything. Really! You amaze me a lot of times with the depth of your knowledge. I don't listen to other people about stuff, but when you say it, it just comes out right and it makes me think, "Maybe this is right. Maybe I'm thinking wrong." You've taught me to be more open-minded than I would have been if you hadn't been in my life. Stuff growing up during my time wasn't the same. You taught me that I can be aware of things without jumping to conclusions.
Tara on her mom, Debra
1. I agree that we share kindness. You have taught me how to take care of people you care about and different ways that that can look like, which has been very helpful for me. We also take pride in being good to other folks. It's not we brag about it, but it's important so we make sure we do it. But we're also very clear when we're not going to put up with stuff *laughs*
2. You're more traditional than me to a certain extent. I tend to not be as traditional in a lot of different ways. I agree that I tend to be--I don't see myself as adventurous- but I tend to be like "Okay, we're just gonna do it!" I think I'm more willing to try different stuff. I welcome change and you hate change *laughs*
3. Just having pride in yourself really. Showing up like you had worth, like when you use to show to work with your suits and stuff, like "I'm about to show up like I should be here." I told you when my students asked me "Why are you dressed up for work?" I said, "Uh...because I think my job is important and I should show up like it is," and they said "Girl, what?!"